PostHeaderIcon It's not Your Mother's Sex Toy Anymore

So many articles about Second Life, or that mention Second Life always seem to throw-in the quip of how 'over-sexed avatars are always getting it on' - making it seem like that particular activity just happens to be the favorite in-world activity of the majority of Second Life residents.

Meh.
Just as well. It doesn't matter that less that 15% of in-world users even have cybersex on their mind, I figured I'd go ahead and throw my hat into the fray. Why not?

"Second Life is riddled with over-sexed freaks who are addicted to bizarre, freaky, unmentionable, socially disgusting and should-be-illegal zombies driving cartoon characters on a computer, spending real money to add a cartoon penis or vagina all to mash them together, simulating lewd, crude, freakish acts against nature and offending all living and inert objects including rocks and dirt, all while masturbating wildly and frantically at their computers with one hand!"


Well, there. Now I feel like a self-richeous, self-important, more-popular-than-I-could-ever-possibly-be with fewer-readers than can fit into a Volkswagen beetle who thinks he knows what he's talking about when he writes about Second Life and tries so painfully hard to sound authoritative but absolutely, irrevocably fails miserably and makes my has-been newspaper look really, really bad, journalist.


I may be completely wrong about this next part, so we'll just say it's all hearsay and rumor. Innuendo.

Way back when I was doing a lot of reading about Second Life and Linden Lab and Linden Research and old uncle Phil, I remember reading a lot of really interesting stuff that I just never gave a lot of thought to until now.

Have you ever wondered why Linden Lab is often referred to as Linden Research? Ever wonder why Linden Lab calls itself a Lab? Well, I have it on good authority (and again, this could be completely off-base, so just opinion conjecture here,) that after old Philip left real Networks the other day, he wanted to get back into his own thing.

You see, he was picked-up by Real because he had this knack for getting working video to... well, work over the internet. Now we all know that sex sells. VHS tapes would never exist if it weren't for the bootleg pr0n tapes that everyone was copying over and over for each other and that's a fact.

We wouldn't have a lot of the Worldwide Web technologies we have now if it weren't for the pr0n industry and that's a fact. Pr0n sells. Philip knew that. It was rumored that among whatever it was he was getting back to and selling over there on Linden street or way or lane or avenue or whatever those San Franciscans like to call it these days, might have included a striptease or two. Now that really is only rumor, but a funny one at that (it's a comment made to a reporter by a business neighbor taking wild guesses as to what he was up to over there - and repeated in an article about Philip and Second Life.)

Now I also have heard that Linden Research has a patent on the... well... let's just say the ability to 'control one device remotely through the internet, via a web page or other method'. Now, imagine how popular pr0n is, and imagine the ability to create a device that can be controlled remotely via some scripting on a web page and put two and ten together, whaddayagot?

~wink, wink~

Now, the further rumor goes that there was a cool three-dimensional space software that was first created for the purpose of and to demonstrate whatever these new devices and inventions [ahem, cough, cough] were. However, it is rumored the Venture Capitol people or someone or who-other, whatever became more interested in the demonstration software than the product for which the software was created to demonstrate. Or so the story goes.

And thus the legend of a fairy-tale of a rumor has it that Second Life and the grid were actually nothing more than a quick slap-together demonstration platform to test and visualize the use of remote-controlled internet pr0n toys so people can cyber together in more realism than ever has existed before.

But, this is all rumor and innuendo.
I said all that so I could say all this:

I've known about teledildonics for a long-assed time. I've also heard of people trying to get them to work (yes, actually know a couple women who bought the things and tried to get them to work. Hey, I was hoping they would - wink-wink.)

However, part of what makes the above a surefire definite rumor is that Linden Lab ...er, rather Linden Research couldn't have possibly invented the things, Microsoft must have, because they are apparently as frustrating and reliable as Microsoft Windows with regard to setting them up and getting them to actually work with and through the internet.

Then again, with the reliability of the Second Life grid, plausibility stubbornly remains that Linden Research may still have been involved in the invention. Even if only slightly.

But, I digress.

The point of all this is where is Linden Lab's profit coming from? Private Estate tiers?
...or the licensing royalties of the apparently coming-of-age and popularity of teledildonics because of patent rights:

Gaziantep haber, haberler, haberleri, online haber [ Textual Satisfaction: Beyond the Sex Machine ]: "Even Second Life players, whose characters are already capable of having sex with one another, are using software so their avatars can have sex that is more realistic. Some people make friends beyond these real life simulations and take it a step further and have cybersex with one another sans avatars. They fire up the webcams and microphones and masturbate, simulating sex in front of their cameras for one another to watch. "



Oh, and you gotta go to the original article because the have to coolest, funniest, ermmm most accurate? ... picture there that simply has to be seen. So I ripped it for future use here.

~Evil grin.~

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